Los Angeles Travel Goddess Vicki Arkoff ignored her cardiologist’s orders and returned to a favorite Hollywood greasy spoon for another hearty (and possibly heart-stopping) helping of the city’s best soul food. 

Every day, tour-bus mobs stop at Hollywood & Vine to shoot photos of Walk of Fame sidewalk stars. If only they knew that just five blocks away they might have run into the real deal at a Hollywood landmark missing from their tourist maps…

Just steps from Sunset Boulevard, in a windowless, wood-planked storefront, is the original Roscoe’s House of Chicken ‘n’ Waffles, Hollywood’s first black-owned restaurant, and an entertainment industry hangout since 1975. Chris Rock, Eddie Murphy, Cuba Gooding, and Ice Cube are among the regulars here. It also attracts recording artists from nearby Capitol Records too, and actors from Paramount another few blocks south. Pretty much everyone here is a repeat customer because this is a true joint, folks. A place where all kinds of people go again and again to meet up, chat, and dig into the best Harlem-style soul food in the city.

Roscoe’s has recently doubled in size, but the ambiance remains ramshackle- cafeteria, so if nothing else, it’s evidence that people come for the food. Down-home, no-nonsense soul food. There’s fried chicken, grits, greens, cornbread, sweet potato pie, red beans ‘n’ rice, biscuits ‘n’ gravy…all the artery-clogging southern classics.

They’re served up in every possible combination too. Shuffle them like cards and deal ‘em out – they’re all on the menu somewhere. For instance there’s “The Stubby” – one breast with leg or wing, grits, two large eggs and a biscuit – not to be confused with the “The Oscar” – three chicken wings, grits, one egg and biscuit. That order is Roscoe’s security guard’s favorite. And he’s the size of Alabama, so that might give you a clue about the enormous calorie load on even the “lighter” plates.

The real menu star at Roscoe’s is right there in the restaurant’s name: Chicken ‘n’ Waffles. The combination sounds like a huge mistake, even to southern soul food devotees, but it’s an old Harlem tradition and it’s magic. It helps to know what you’re doing, so here’s the drill:

First you choose between two chicken traditions: Southern Fried (crispy and dry) or “smothered” (covered with gravy and onions). Then you pick which pieces you want (wing, leg, thigh, breast, livers, giblets) or to just go for a 1?4 or 1?2 bird. Then you decide on your sides and either order a la carte or try to find the closest facsimile from the combo plates, because what you’re going to need next is a waffle or two.

To eat the stuff, sure, you could use the thin, tin knife and fork sitting there. But to make like a local just pick up that drumstick, wrap it in a buttered waffle, and dunk it in the maple syrup. That’s right. Dunk it. At least that’s what my lunch date told me during my virgin meal there, and no one batted an eye then or since. Sure it’s messy, but that’s what the huge bowl of “Wet Naps” is for.

Sound too heavy for you for breakfast? Amateur. Of course Roscoe’s also offers “Big Mama Special,” a breakfast must-have I must have forgotten to try all these years: eggs scrambled with onions and cheese, served with potatoes and a biscuit…and, of course, with everything smothered in that gooey, gluey gravy.

So go with the flow and don’t bother looking for menu items that won’t knock years off your life expectancy. They’re not here. Even the chef’s salad has fried chicken in it, so just eat up and shut up.

I’m always tempted to order the Carol C. Special, but you get twice as much for less than $2 more with “Scoe’s #1”: 1?4 fried chicken with two waffles. “Buckwheat waffles,” I always special order. “And crispy please.” Takes a little extra time but better than the undercooked buttermilk ones that usually come. (And they usually come 30 – 40 long minutes after ordering.) Besides, what’s another few minutes when you’re already waited 40 – 60 minutes outside for a table next to the rest rooms, and another 20 inside waiting for a waitress?

Roscoe’s allegedly slow service is the other big tradition here, and it’s a joke. Literally. It’s so legendary it’s been lampooned in “Soul Plane,” “MAD TV,” “Tapeheads,” numerous times by Will Smith in “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” and in a terrible 2004 film called, funny enough, “Roscoe’s House of Chicken n Waffles” (with Cuba Gooding Jr.’s R&B singer dad in a bit part).

Roscoe’s has also been fondly mentioned in “Rush Hour,” “Jackie Brown,” “Swingers,” and The Notorious B.I.G.’s “Going Back to Cali.” It was respectfully featured in Anthony Bourdain’s “No Reservations” food series and in Chamillionare’s “Hip Hop Police” music video where Roscoe’s was shown being (fictionally) seized by SWAT teams because it advocated hip-hop culture. Brilliant.

As far as I know no one’s ever given props to Gladys Knight & Ron Winans’ Chicken & Waffles in a movie or rap song. In 1997 the two singers founded a similar restaurant chain down south but everyone in Cali knows where that idea came from. That’s right, sister. Umm hmm. Snap.

I flag down John, the earnest host who has greeted and seated guests here since the restaurant first opened. Knowing that he’s seen it all, I start to pump him for info about the restaurant’s founder, Herb Hudson, and the secret origin of his strange chicken ‘n’ waffle combo.

“Oh no, no, no,” he despairs, straightening a stack of menus and giving the enormous security guard a don’t-let-any-folks-sneak-in-ahead-of-the-line glance. “Not on a Sunday, honey. Never on Sunday. I’ve got a job to do! But come on a Monday or Tuesday and I’ll sit down and tell you all about it.”

You can count on it. As soon as I recover from triple-by-pass surgery. Roscoe’s House of Chicken ‘n’ Waffles is a guilty pleasure I’m willing to die for.

Roscoe’s House of Chicken ‘n’ Waffles:  1514 N. Gower St., Hollywood. A few doors north of Sunset Blvd. Open 8:30 a.m. – 2 a.m.  Reservations?  You’ve got to be kidding. First come, first served, so go midweek to be seated in under an hour. Or go for the late night scene when it’s too late for dinner and too early for breakfast, so why not have both on one plate? You can find the website at – www.roscoeschickenandwaffles.com.

Four other locations in the greater Los Angeles area:#

Inglewood: 106 W. Manchester Blvd., at Main.
Long Beach: 730 E. Broadway Blvd. near Alamitos Ave.
Pasadena: 830 N. Lake Ave., between Orange Grove and Washington.
West Los Angeles: 5006 W. Pico Blvd., near La Brea.